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Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Emo Post

Man, I've never felt so exhausted. It's so confusing,
because I'm not doing anything. I'm working, and then
I come home and put on cartoons and make jewelry.
That's it. This routine does not constitute exhaustion.

The jewelry.

This is the first push I've made to actually create a
product and sell it. And it's dissapointing. I really
love my jewelry, and I would wear it all. But etsy is
filled to the brim with talented people. People who
do this full time, and do it better and faster than I do.
I really appreciate all of my friends who have been
supporting me, and buying from me. I really hope none
of you feel pressured when I complain on twitter, or
shamelessly plug on every site I have. Thank you guys.

But really, I probably wouldn't work so hard on it, or
stress about it if I had some sort of social life, or
romantic life. I don't. And it's getting depressing.
I feel like I've spent the last 9 months in my room.
I can honestly say I really have spent the last month
in my room.

I'm almost 30, and I'm watching cartoons in my parents
basement. Yikes...

It's getting harder to stop thinking along the lines of
what I should be doing, as opposed to what I want to do.
No strike that, those two things have become the same thing.

Anyway, I'm sorry I haven't been commenting on your blogs.
It starts to get hard reading about pregnancies, and babies.
Wonderful husbands and anniversaries.
I guess I was going to post about snowmobiling with my
dad, and about the drill team alumni dance. I just don't
feel like it, ya know?

Man, I'm exhausted...

19 comments:

Tara said...

Teish I'm sorry! It sounds like you are in a slump and that sucks I know. I just hope you really know how talented and awesome you are. You deserve the best and I want you to be happy!! I wish I could help...
And i want to hear about the alumni dance!

p.s. i'm coming to town easter weekend. So maybe we could do lunch with schmee and moose?

Tara said...

p.s I just looked at your etsy again and bought those cute red leaf earrings. and NOT because I feel sorry for you - because they are freakin cute. So keep up the good work and get those in the mail sister! :)

Teisha said...

Haha, I only assume that's happening cause everytime I bitch, I get an order from my friends. It's my strategy. Just kidding. I am a little slumpy lately. And it takes a lot for me not to delete crap like this after I post it. But, ya know, it's life. I am really so glad that I still have you guys as friends. And I'm so excited to see you again. Your earrings will be in the mail tomorrow and thanks again!

Æxï§ said...

Oh Teisha! I'm so sorry to hear that you're down in the dumps. I don't mean to make things sound rosy in my preggo world and make you feel worse. To be honest, I don't post what's REALLY going through my mind - how scared, stressed, and confused I constantly feel - because I DON'T want to bring others down. Just know that I'm here for you. You ever wanna get out? I'm here. You want to vent & cry on someone's shoulder? I'm here. Seriously. Keep your head up & keep up the good work on your awesome jewelry! (BTW...any plans for more silver jewelry?) Let me know when you're free and we'll either have a pity party or just good conversation time. I rarely get out anymore either!

Teisha said...

I hope you don't think my comments were directed toward you. I think there are about 15 people I know who are pregnant. And I don't know your situation my dear (we must get together and talk) but I know that not everything is rosy for everyone. Blogs paint a pretty picture, and I think I'm one of the few that allow my weak moments to be viewed by my small army of followers. I really do appreciate you offering a pity party and I think I am going to take you up on that. But, Laura mentioned that you wanted to get together for a movie. And I think maybe we all need a good laugh more than a cry. Well, at least I do.

And let's see, it's been a while since I've done a straight silver piece. I've been so obsessed with florals and color lately. It's very strange. But I will make something for you.

LJ Elkins said...

Yeah, all those damned happy, pregnant, and just plain fertile people can SUCK IT. Okay...since that applies to most of my best friends...I guess I don't really mean it. Okay, maybe I do. OKAY, not really (except really, actually). *cough*

Æxï§ said...

Oh Teisha, Love! I didn't think your comments were directed towards me in particular. I just wanted to explain that my world is DEFINITELY less than rosey right now. AND...You don't have to make something silver specifically for me. I LOVE the stuff you're doing now, I just need to start wearing warmer tones to wear them. I was just insenuating that if you ever do make anything silver, and even with COLORS, I'd probably buy lots of it because pretty much the only metals I wear are silver. But don't make anything specifically for me. I'd feel bad.
And YES! I think we should find a comedy to go to one of these days. Let's see..."I Love You Man" just came out, and "The Accidental Husband" comes out tomorrow. If you're wanting to reconnect with your childhood "Monsters vs. Aliens" (in 3D no less) comes out tomorrow as well. ANNNNNND that's all I got so far!

Laura, I'd really prefer NOT to "suck it" 'til I find out exactly WHAT it is that I'd be sucking exactly. Wait, actually...strike that. I don't wanna "suck it" at all! :P

Æxï§ said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
LJ Elkins said...

Ooo deleted comments are always so mysterious. Monsters vs Aliens!! That has my vote just because it's in 3D. I don't actually know what it is though. Oh and Alexis, you don't HAVE to suck it. I was just, you know. Saying you had that option. If you wanted to. I, however, do not have that option...YET.

LJ Elkins said...

But seriously, Teisha. I think we could all use to get out more...even me. And I'd say I get out at LEAST 4 times a year. So let's go do something. Dammit, I say we have a bingo night (except not play bingo, because that is lame. by "bingo" I of course mean "do something cool") once a month or something.

heather said...

Teish, cheer up! You have so much going for you. You and Bird need to get out and meet people. (Easier said than done, I know.) I sent you an invite for a little get together on behalf of Mac and Lindsee and one of those dreaded spawns that we're all carrying (no seriously, I swear EVERYONE is pregnant)and we really want you to come. I sent it to two different emails so hopefully I got one right. If not Sat. 7pm my house. There will be quite the spread of food compliments of the all mighty Jess. I just love you girly and I hope things perk up for you. How would an afternoon shopping sound? I so need to get out and do something!

p.s. love that you're real on your blog. It is really a breath of fresh air.

Æxï§ said...

Because I'm too boring to actually BE mysterious, the reason there was a deleted post is because my computer was lagging and I ended up posting my comment twice. Yup.

Teisha said...

Laura, I am doing a sexy dance for your ovaries.

Alexis - I am working on a silver piece with teal accents. It is going to be a pretty whimsical necklace, but there are going to be a lot of elements to it, so it will be dramatic. I will let you know when I'm done so you can see it.

Alexis and Laura - I am down for any movie, except chick flicks or romantic crap. It will have to wait until I get paid. I have 15 dollars to last me for a week. Unless I make some money on Saturday at Area when I'm vending. But let's still plan on it.

Heather - I did get the invite, and I have been trying to see if I can squeeze it in between work and vending that night. But I don't think I'm going to have the time. It really came down to the fact that you live west of me. I feel terrible and I really want to go. But I figure there will be plenty of other shower opportunities. I don't think I can afford shopping for a while, but maybe lunch or something. Wow, I need to post stuff like this more. I might have a social life, if only out of people feeling bad for me. Haha

Jess said...

That is totally Emo, and you're cool for documenting (and not deleting). I am the kind of person who cannot even keep a journal because I end up scribbling everything out or destroying them. Heaven forbid someone else know about the malevolent or distraught thoughts I have in my little brain.

But seriously, bring on the snowmobiling and drill team pics. I heard you guys had a riot (at the dance, I've not been stalking you on family outings). (Or have I?) :)

On that getting out thing... $49 flight to vegas and a spot on Tara's floor???

The Judd Family said...

Don't worry!!! It's only a Utah thing! I went out to see Rick in Michigan and they were shocked that I was married and pregnant at the time. Almost all of his friends there are single with no immediate plans for marriage and they are the same age as you. For some reason we just do everything too soon here. You will just be more mature and better prepared then some people were. And, besides your so cute...it won't be long!

Tara said...

I second Jess's comment! Come play in Vegas! It's supposed to be 80 this week. And I do have an extra bed so you won't have to sleep on the couch. come on, you know you want to!

Maranda said...

I'm sorry your feeling down:( Along the lines of what Jenny said, It really is a Utah thing. You are young, you are cute, you have talent, you are fun, the list goes on... You will get where you want to be. Hang in there.

It was so great to see you and dance like old times.

I Love ya Teish

Teisha said...

Thanks everyone for the nice comments and encouragement. I have my nights of feeling bad for myself. Which is exactly what I was doing.

Jess and Tara - Are you talking about Vegas this weekend?

Tiffany Jenson said...

you would never guess all the crazy stuff that goes through my head?????? your just fine, just go with the flow. booth & i are always here for you. it always cheers me up to watch my fav shows too, ESCAPE........